Sometimes I really think God is saying, “Chanel you got it twisted girl.” Seriously, I think that a lot of times He is saying you must’ve forgot. I run this. I allow you to assist me. I run this show, you’re the production assistant.
As I reflected on my past year I thought about how much I felt like I didn’t have the strength to keep on. I just didn’t think I could give anything else. And that’s when God reminded me that it’s not about me being strong. I was so caught up in life and mistakes and sin. It’s almost as though a part of me felt that I needed to try to earn God back, but where did I think He had gone? And while I was so caught up on that, I really realized that I was caught up on myself.
When you start focusing on your life and your sin, you start belittling God. You make you and your situations bigger than Him because you focus on them more than you do on Him. And eventually you start thinking you will never be good enough and your sins are too far and wide to forgive. Truth is, we were never good enough, but Christ was and is.
Briefly, this is how God broke it down to me when I got so caught up in focusing on my sins:
You still think this is about you. You think this is about you being strong enough. You think this is about you deserving me. You didn’t deserve me before you sinned you most certainly won’t after the sin. But when you accepted Christ I accepted you into my eternal dwelling place. Now don’t go on sinning but do go on believing that I do forgive you of those sins. Confess and repent. Accept that I’ve forgiven you. It’s incomprehensible how I could forgive wretched and vile behavior but I can and I do. It was incomprehensible that a virgin could give birth to a baby but she did.
One incomprehensible act lead to incomprehensible forgiveness. Enjoy it.
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