God, it is not Your vision that I live in financial ruin. You don’t have a life of decaying health, emotional strain or mental instability in Your grand plan. That is not how You envisioned me when You created me, and it most certainly does not need to be the vision that I have for myself.
And in having that vision and living that lie, I’m living in paralysis. Paralysis of the spirit. There is a spiritual inability to act or function as the person You created me to be when I believe and live that lie. I’m not allowing Your Holy Spirit to work in my life by believing that lie.
It’s past time to start understanding that You aren’t a God that has a vision of imperfection. Yes, we do things that aren’t in Your will and become imperfect, but that is not how You vision our lives. And even then, You still use it all to glorify and honor Your kingdom.
So, obviously the problem isn’t You. It’s me. It’s my imperfect thoughts. It’s my settling. It’s my spiritual paralysis that’s the problem. When You thought of me, You thought of me as perfect. When You think of me, You still think of me in a loving way. So why is it so hard to see myself as better, when my Creator sees me as the best?