I have to be honest. It feels like it’s either no time or no energy.
I’ve thought maybe I was just being lazy or I wasn’t making the time for some things. That could still be the case, but right now I think it’s either or in my life. Either I don’t have enough hours in the day or I don’t have enough energy for the day.
It sucks. It sounds like an excuse, but it’s not. I don’t think… Without energy, you really can’t do anything. I’ve had pneumonia twice, and I literally had no energy to sit up.
The question I have for myself however, is how does knowing that, not give me an extra boost? How do I remember having to lay down like Grandpa Joe from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and not automatically want to get up and dance any day that I’m not in that state?
Why am I not even more motivated by remembering where I once was?
That question poses a bigger issue than time and energy. It exposes me. Remembering where you were, knowing where you could be, and seeing where you are are three of the most important things any one person could do. And if knowing I could be worse and that I once was still isn’t enough, then what will it take?
So, instead of having to find out what it will take, how’s about just being motivated by those things that have been instead of having to experience what could be if I don’t start appreciating them.