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Writer's pictureChanel Moore

Love is Colorblind

Racism is real and it’s ugly. Anyone with any sense knows that. However, every white person you meet isn’t racist. Every black person isn’t racist. Every Hispanic isn’t racist, and so forth. By limiting your dating criteria, you are somewhat limiting the ability to experience different things in life.

Some people are racist. It’s the ugly truth. But why let them win by dating the way they think you should date? By me saying I will only date black men, I am agreeing that the racist is right. They say I don’t fit with anyone else so don’t try. They say I don’t belong with anyone but “my kind.”

Discrimination exists in many forms. Yes, it shows itself more clearly in certain forms, but let’s not pretend like it’s just a black and white thing. I have been discriminated against by my own race of people as well. Every person in any race does not have a vendetta against you. Although there is a lot of history that makes it seem otherwise, there are a lot of present times that no longer support that notion.

God made us all very different and unique. If I am wrong, I pray that God shows me the right way. I just don’t believe He made all these wonderful different people for me to limit myself to only one group. And I don’t believe that He put forgiveness in place for us to continue to hold grudges against an entire group of people for what one person did.

Love is colorblind. I just don’t see how you can have an ideal love, but a specific color or race that he/she has to be. Your love is not ideal, your preference is.

The world will forever have single people because a lot of people refuse to date anyone who doesn’t fit their appearance criteria. Preferences and dating standards are not the same thing so don’t convince yourself that they are.

A preference is what you want, not what you need. It’s a sad day when I meet a person that has so much to offer me and I look past it all because their skin color isn’t my preference, or because their eyes aren’t the color I like. And it’s an even sadder day when I expect them to change that just for me because I don’t have the sense to appreciate the individual that GOD created them to be.

My bottom line is that I’m going to be happy. I am going to be happily married. And the truth is that I don’t know what he’ll look like. I am not limiting myself to one type of man or one race of men. Why would I do that?

Everyday people complain about dating. Some of us love to complain about how there aren’t any good black men or how all the good ones date white women, etc. Who cares?

The truth is that there may not be A LOT of good black men where you are, but there are A LOT of good men out there. I’m not saying interracial dating is easy, I don’t personally know. I do know that dating in general is hard enough without putting yourself in an already shallow pool.

Everyone wants real love. Well, real love happens between godly people. And godly people happen to be all shapes, colors, and sizes. What I used to think was a preference really wasn’t one. It’s my standard. My standard and need is to marry a godly man. I don’t think I deserve a black man nearly as much as I know I deserve a good man.

You may genuinely prefer someone just like you, and that’s your preference. I’m just saying, stop complaining about being single when you’re limiting the dating pool on your own, and stop complaining about others’ preferences when you have your own.

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