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I think I’ve found it easier to pray for someone’s healing on earth than I have for God’s will to be done. Yeah, I’ve certainly found that easier.

What if it’s God’s will that she doesn’t get healed on earth? What if He wants her whole in Heaven with Him now? I should want that. I do want that for everyone. But right now? Right now, I don’t want to pray for that.

Right now, I want her to be healed, but not that way. I want that kind of healing that makes me feel better. I want that kind of healing that’s easier to pray for because it’s what I want. I want God to heal, I just want Him to heal the way I want it done.

I think that’s the thought process that we don’t admit is taking place in our minds. I see how selfish it sounds. And I know that’s how I feel sometimes. I know Heaven is better. It’s the best. But for some reason, it’s harder to pray the God will heal someone the best way, when we know it’s not the easiest for us.

It’s inevitable that the best healing comes through death, when you know the Lord. Yet, it seems to be the hardest thing to pray for when you’re going through the sickness of a loved one. Loss is interesting. We know that when a Christian dies, gain is the only outcome. But that doesn’t make it any easier to see them go.

And the funny thing is that we mourn and grieve for them, and they don’t understand why…

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